The feet post I wrote yesterday is already the third highest hit post on my spaz blog in the three years it's been going. One of the books lined up in my writing queue is everything I've figured out about getting healthy again. I've got 15+ working titles queued, once the first one is done, hoping to roll the rest off the assembly line fairly regularly.

Alas, plans today have abruptly rearranged themselves. My droid keeps screaming at me that it's got viruses that'll cause imminent failure, so I must jaunt to the phone store for assistance. This started last night from a new twitter follower. I check out ALL my followers, and this one had a nice dotcom set up like an internet magazine for geeks, maybe not quite as polished as a slick professional site rocking money on ad support but still nicely done, and bing, there you go. People who get their own dotcoms going without a clue about protection are the ones who pass nasty germs around. My worst trojan came from an Andromeda scifi fan site years ago. People have been pushing me to get my own dotcom going for years, well, as long as I keep using hosts, I don't have to worry about the maintenance, do I? Last thing I want is for my fans to say I gave them tech herpes.

I thought things were rough a couple of winters ago when Scott spent all his spare time playing Legend of Zelda, and now I look back on that winter as magical and sane and happy. I fondly cherish the memories of that winter. All the little frustrations- the pony races over and over, the bongo drums over and over, the ice sea, the rolling fire balls, the nasty spider bats... the hope, the discoveries, the beautiful gems.

My head is a jumble. Sometimes I just need some pretty music.

)

Stuff to do, throwing a roast into the crockpot, burrito later, maybe some super OCD organization or something. When I'm slinging big laundry and chunking the house around at 6 a.m. because the pain sucking that bad makes me pissy as hell, God help anyone trying to call me with a problem or even just trying to be nice today. The stories I distract myself with in my head while I work under this kind of duress get pretty violent. Gotta keep myself even more distracted with something cute.

Lidocaine. In my stomach. Yesterday. Maybe virus. Whatever, I've lost 4 pounds, I'm cool with it. Suffering has it rewards.

I am now going to distract myself with my top ten favstars up to this point before I go slam through some more PT and then come home to burrito, whom I love. These will click to original addresses where the pix and timestamps will pop open. Jeri Ryan (Seven of Nine) quote-retweeting me has unfortunately been lost to time, but it's still fun to come back and check on stuff. I imagine little accidents like that are how I wind up on Sumall's 1 million mention reach reports. All that means is that more people had the potential to see the name Pinky, nothing much else happened as a consequence. If Wil Wheaton had retweeted me... woulda been a different story.

Two I'm keeping my eye on because they could still bump up a little.

See? Significant time waster and kept my mind off how much the pain is sucking. Now I need to move on and get out the door.

This song pops into my head a LOT on sucky days. All you people who can drink and drug yourself away from your problems- hello. I hope to wave to you from a sweeter place soon.

Sometimes I use euphemisms like 'rough' when people ask how I'm doing on a really bad week. I don't like talking about it because it seems like making words for how I feel makes me feel it more, and I'm trying not to feel it. I've been functional since the fall, no outward appearances of problems, but the pain spikes and nausea are getting severe enough I think I'll go back in for a recheck. Maybe this time they'll clear me for a pain shot or something. On the bright side, my fasting glucose this morning was 85.

Scott's boss pulled the company sale off the table, so there's a relief, although we know it may be a somewhat temporary reprieve. For now, though, vacation is back on the table, huzzah!

Burrito mama has had a few interviews since her department announced a shutdown deadline, fingers crossed. She renewed her lease and we came to an agreement about helping with childcare so they won't have to be homeless again. Third time wasn't the charm trying to make things work out with daddy. Keep moving forward, I say.

Still technically on watch for another month but so far made it through the first round of cancer testing without scarier news, so maybe I can stay on track with PT and have surgery this summer after we're back from vacation.

Speaking of PT, that cute little abrupt skiing accident I had in the back yard might have enhanced a few problems. I cannot expound enough on the joys of living without pain meds, but I can say I'm thrilled my years of discipline using pain to super focus my brain worked beautifully yesterday.

I think I am successfully navigating the choppy compulsion-to-disappear-again waters. This was the very first vid rescue I ever did in May of 2012. It was so brilliantly done, I couldn't bear the thought of it disappearing...