July 28, 2014

• we know our drugs

  I *did* have a frickin awesome Monday! My dentist is dang awesome, have a long history of salvaging broken teeth with him from all my TMJ spasms and grinding my teeth in my sleep. I asked if we could try just sealing it first since the tooth is still in such awesome shape anyway, besides part of it going AWOL last fall. He has rebuilt teeth for me before with a bonding material that hardens up super fast, and he said sure, we could try that again and if it doesn't work he'll just deduct what I paid for that today from what the crown he originally wanted to do would cost. (This isn't the first time we've tried it, don't know why it's not the standard first action for repair before something so rough as crowns are done.) So right off the bat that dropped $600 off and canceled the second appointment, BOOYA!!!

  

  He also said it was the best I've ever handled sitting there with my mouth open that long. I'm usually antsy to begin with, and that's before all the smells and sounds and vibrations. Don't get me wrong, I'm having a jim dandy nearly nasty jaw spasm and all kinds of odd shooting pain referring around the roof of my mouth and skull and rebounding off the roots of all my teeth, and my speech is already slurring a little from all the musculature in my tongue root and throat and jaw spasming up, but right now I can actually still think. (It's 3:45 pm Monday right now.) I used to make 'cocktails' out of my meds, so I staggered some benadryl early on about an hour before the meloxicam (benadryl is a potentiator- check that out for a laugh) and then two hours later just before my appointment I took half a zyrtec with half a xanax. I figured zyrtec might also potentiate since it's an h1 antihistamine like benadryl, and it also crosses the brain barrier so it's good for anxiety, and between all that I was able to mimic a vicodin experience even though I hadn't had an opiate. I made it through 45 actual minutes of flexed-neck-jaw-open stillness and only had to stop him once briefly when my jaw suddenly spasmed, didn't want to bite the guy and screw up what he was doing.

  

  THIS is how spoonies learn to get through pain. We know our drugs. Sadly, what I have available now is very limited and already wearing off, so I'm on my own the rest of the evening. And since I have a history of this kind of fibro trigger lasting for several days, I need to get my attention back on moving around and staying busy so my muscles can keep stretching out. I might not be able to chew for awhile. The year Scott's girl was in first grade my TMJ/fibromyalgia was so bad that I would hide during lunchtime on my job so no one would see me cry when my jaw locked up around a bite of food, and Thanksgiving that year I could only eat potatoes and gravy. I've learned in the years since how NOT to keep triggering and how to help it relax back out. First thing I have to do is shut this laptop and walk away, so I'm going to make some cream of wheat for supper. See ya.

  • 4:39 pm
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